20 perfect first message online dating examples

perfect first message online dating examples

Looking for perfect first message online dating examples? You’ve come to the right place.

Navigating through the world of online dating can certainly be intimidating, but once you’ve matched with someone who seems promising, it’s crucial to make a good impression with your initial message.

The first message you send to a potential match can often be the determining factor in whether or not the conversation will continue, making it crucial to get it right.

Coming up with the perfect first message can be even harder than crafting an attractive profile with compelling pictures and a bio that’s witty yet informative.

It can be difficult to strike a balance between being intriguing yet respectful, charming yet not overbearing, and witty yet informative. However, it is important to remember that everyone is in the same boat, and a genuine effort to connect with someone can go a long way in finding a meaningful relationship.

Standing out from the competition when introducing yourself to a potential connection on an online profile can surely be difficult. However, before worrying about finding that perfect first message, opt for genuine interest in their passions and interests by reviewing their profile first.

First Message Strategy #1 Look for conversation ideas in their profile

One of the simplest ways to initiate a conversation with someone on an online dating platform is by referencing something in their profile or pictures that you can relate to and asking a question or making a comment about it. If you’re wondering what are some clever first messages, check the perfect first message online dating examples below.


  1. Read their bio carefully. Look for common interests or hobbies that you can mention in your message. For instance, “Hey, I saw you’re into photography, what kind of camera do you use?”
  2. Check out their photos and see if there are any interesting details you can comment on. For example, if they have a photo of themselves hiking, you could ask them about a place you hiked. To illustrate, “I saw your profile photo background at the [insert mountain name]. Have you ever been to [insert mountain name]?”
  3. Look at their job or education information. This can be a good way to find a topic that you both have in common. For example, “I see that you’re a graphic designer, that’s really cool. Which is your favorite tool to work with?”
  4. Check to see if they have any music or movie preferences listed. If they shared a favorite band or movie, you could use that as a starting point for a conversation. For example, “I saw that you like The Beatles, what’s your favorite song of theirs?”
  5. Finally, pay attention to their writing style. Do they use a lot of humor? Are they more serious? Tailor your message to their tone and style to show that you’ve really read their profile and are interested in getting to know them better. For instance, “Your profile had me laughing, I love your sense of humor. Want to grab a drink sometime?”

While the last message example may seem like it comes too quickly, they’ll appreciate being treated in accordance with who they are; funny and easygoing. Reviewing their profile first will give you insight into what kind of tone works best for that conversation starter.

First Message Strategy #2 Use their name

Using someone’s name in a first message can make them feel seen and acknowledged, which can lead to a more positive response. Making this effort will give your introductory conversation that all-important personal touch. Below you can see in more detail perfect first message examples while using their name.


  1. “Hey [name]! I saw on your profile that you know German. Any TV Show suggestion that could help me learn the language?
  2. “Hey [name]! I noticed we both love Thai food,[name]. Do you have any favorite spots in the city?”
  3. “Hey [name]! I saw that you’re really into yoga. Any tips for a beginner?”
  4. Hey [name]! I see we both love hiking. What’s your favorite trail around here?”
  5. “Hey [name]! I saw that you’re into music. What’s the latest song you’re listening too?

Using someone’s name in a first message can help you stand out from other messages they may receive, and it shows that you took the time to read their profile and learn a bit about them before reaching out. Just make sure to spell their name correctly, and avoid using any overly familiar nicknames until you get to know them better.

first message online dating

First Message Strategy #3 Share Something Personal from their Bio

One way to show that you’ve read someone’s profile and are genuinely interested in getting to know them is to share something personal from their bio in your first message. Here are a few perfect first message online dating examples of how to do that:


  1. “Hey [name], I noticed that you’re a big fan of traveling. I recently went on a trip to Europe and had the best time. Do you have any upcoming trips planned?”
  2. “Hi [name], I noticed on your profile that you go to fitness too. Any tips for a beginner?
  3. “Hey [name], I noticed that you’re a dog lover. Here’s my golden retriever named Charlie *insert a photo of the dog*. Do you have any pets?”
  4. “Hello [name], I see that you’re a big reader. I just finished a great book called [insert title], have you read it?”
  5. “Hello [name], I saw you like Green Day. ‘Wake me up when September ends’ song is my favorite.

Sharing something personal from their bio can help break the ice and give you something to talk about that you know they’re interested in. Just make sure not to reveal too much personal information about yourself too soon, and keep the conversation light and fun.

First Message Strategy #4 Keep it simple

When it comes to sending a first message on a dating app, it’s important to keep it simple and straightforward. By doing this, you can make a connection with the other person without overwhelming them with too much information or too many questions. Below you can see some perfect first message online dating examples with this strategy.


  1. “I don’t quite like the Beatles song that you posted. Is that a deal breaker?”
  2. “Looks like the app matched us. Please tell me that besides Friends, you watched The Office too?”
  3. “I’m guessing the app matched us because we both like cooking. What’s the latest cooking recipe you tried?”
  4. “Hi there, I noticed you’re a music lover. Here’s a song for a great start of the day *insert the song’s link*
  5. “Hey [name], I noticed that you’re a foodie like me. Have you tried the food at [insert name of the restaurant]?”

Keeping your first message simple can help you avoid coming across as too pushy or aggressive. It also gives the other person an opportunity to respond without feeling overwhelmed. Just be sure to avoid sending one-word messages or messages that seem like copy and paste messages for dating sites, as these can come across as insincere or disingenuous.

First Message Strategy #5 Re-read what you wrote

One of the most important things to do before sending a first message on a dating app is to re-read what you wrote. This can help you catch any typos or errors that might can make you look careless or uninterested, and this can be a major turn-off for the other person.


Here are a few examples of messages with typos:

  1. “Hey, I noticed you’re into travling. Have you visted any cool palces recently?”
  2. “Hi, I noticed you’re a big fan of musci. What are some of your favortie artists?”

To illustrate the point, see the above examples of messages with typos. In the first message, “traveling” is misspelled as “travling,” and “visited” is spelled as “visted.” In the second message, “music” is misspelled as “musci,” and “favorite” is spelled as “favortie.”

These errors and typos could have been easily corrected with a quick proofread. By taking the time to double-check your messages before sending them, you can show the other person that you’re taking the conversation seriously and that you care about making a good impression.

Therefore, when sending a first message on a dating app, it is essential to take a moment to review your message carefully and ensure that it is error-free.

Remember, first impressions matter, and taking the time to present yourself in the best light possible can make all the difference in finding the one.

No response after your perfect first message? Here’s what to do

If you’ve sent a first message on a dating app and haven’t received a response, it can be frustrating and disappointing.

Even though it can be tempting to send a follow-up message to try and get their attention,  it’s important to be mindful of the other person’s boundaries and respect their decision not to respond.

Sending multiple messages or pressuring someone to reply can come across as desperate or pushy, and may actually decrease your chances of getting a response in the future. Instead, it’s best to give the other person some space and focus your attention on other potential matches.

Remember, online dating can be a numbers game, and not everyone you message will be interested in getting to know you better. Rejection is a natural part of the online dating process, and it doesn’t mean that you’re not worthy of love or a great match with someone else.

Keep putting yourself out there and be patient, and eventually, you’ll find someone who is interested in getting to know you better.

Conclusion for perfect first message online dating examples

In conclusion, crafting the perfect first message for online dating is a critical step in successfully connecting with potential partners. There are several key elements to consider, such as personalization, attention to detail, and a clear message.

By following some of the examples provided, such as referencing their profile or asking open-ended questions, you can increase your chances of receiving a response and starting a meaningful conversation. It’s also essential to maintain a positive and friendly tone while avoiding clichés or overly aggressive language.

Additionally, taking the time to proofread and edit your message can go a long way in demonstrating your level of interest and investment in the interaction.

Overall, approaching online dating with a thoughtful and intentional approach can help you stand out from the crowd and create a lasting connection. With practice and persistence, you can refine your message writing skills and increase your chances of finding the perfect match.



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